Boston & New England Wedding Photographer Deborah Zoe

Boston & North Shore Wedding Photographer creating timeless imagery for classic New England weddings with a fine art approach.

The Bookworm Club: Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas

Dave and I will be celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary in July. Talking with him the other night he mentioned how he can't really remember a time without me but that it feels like it was only yesterday that we were married. Honestly, I feel the same way. It really does feel like yesterday that we were married and at the same time, it feels like we've known each other forever.

We've learned A LOT about each other and ourselves over these past few years. The good, the bad, and the ugly. That's the wonderful, and sometimes annoying, thing about marriage. It puts a magnifying glass up to your character. Magnifying the good, the bad and the ugly. Marriage is hard. It takes work. And while we have a lifetime to go, I can say that marriage over these past four years has matured us, brought us closer to God and to each other.

Recently, another married couple recommended this book to us and I pretty much read it cover to cover in a few days. The message is solid: Marriage isn't about the fairy tale ending. Marriage is a tool to help us grow, mature and refine our character.

At times Thomas' writing can be a bit stuffy, long winded and a little "preachy", but his message is clear and something that I think a lot of people can relate to. I'd definitely recommend this book to anyone who is engaged or newly married. It really helps to give you a healthy outlook on what marriage is.

As most of you know, Dave and I are not perfect;), nor do we have a perfect marriage. We fight, we bicker, we tease, and we love each other. Just like any other couple we go through our ups and downs. Those spats, those disagreements, those times when we are blindingly stubborn, it's ok. We're in this for the long haul. One of the hardest things that we are STILL learning about marriage is that you can't run away. When things get tough, you have to work through them. We have, what Thomas, describes, as a sacred history. A history together, that we honor, by working through our disagreements, to love only stronger in the end. What a beautiful way to look at marriage! Using your weaknesses to create a stronger, healthier marriage!

You may not agree with everything that Thomas has to write. But I think that we can all agree that marriage is good. Marriage is worth the time, the energy, the effort. Marriage is worth our all. Not just for our marriages, but for our individual character.